Did you know you had a ‘Calming’ nerve?

Did you know you had a ‘Calming’ nerve and you can use it to benefit your health? Let me tell you about it.

As you know, our nervous system is a very complex system, made up of the brain, spinal cord and nerves. It is our body’s communication system and controls a lot of the body’s functions.

An important part of our nervous system is the network of cranial nerves that connect the brain to our head, neck and body. They are either sensory or motor. Think of our sense of smell, taste and touch and movement of muscles. These are just some of the functions of the cranial nerves.

Parts of our nervous system operate automatically eg breathing, digestion, heart rate. Our sympathetic nerves are involved in our ‘fight or flight’ response, physical activity, heart rate and innervation of many body processes.

Parasympathetic nerves on the other hand, are our ‘rest and digest’ nerves. They regulate the function of organs during rest and have a slowing down or dampening effect.

This is where the ‘Calming’ nerve comes in. It is called the Vagus nerve and is the tenth cranial nerve. It’s also one of the most important parasympathetic nerves and one of the longest in the body. It originates in the Brain stem and travels right through the neck, chest, abdomen and the digestive system to the middle of the large intestine. Its’ name comes from ‘vagabond’ and it’s known as the wandering nerve.

The Vagus nerve is truly a calming nerve because it slows down breathing and heart rate so aids in relaxation. It communicates between the gut and the brain and decreases stress, anxiety and fear. It controls our digestion and slows down heart rate. It is also involved in the immune system and decreases inflammation.

Did you know you had a ‘calming’ nerve? We all do and can use it to benefit our health? We are living in an unprecedented time, when so much is out of our control. The news is full of drama and alarm and our stress response has never been so activated. It’s very easy to get caught up in that ‘fight or flight’ mode and never truly relax.

This is where the Vagus nerve comes in. You can work the nerve point for it on your face whenever you are feeling stressed. Do it on a daily basis and you will start to see its’ benefits. You can find the chart here.

You can also take measures to decrease your reaction to stress by avoiding the news, spending time in nature, exercising, eating healthily (most of the time), doing meditation, laughing, being creative and putting some more fun back into your day.

When so much is out of our control, it’s so important to remember what remains in our control. Working the Vagus nerve, our ‘calming’ nerve is something every one of us can do. After all, reducing our stress and staying relaxed is one of the best ways to stay healthy.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

References: Multireflexology Dien Chan by Patrick Aguilar Cassara & Anna Roca, https://www.healthline.com/health/12-cranial-nerves, https://courses.lumenlearning.com/boundless-ap/chapter/functions-of-the-autonomic-nervous-system/, https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/318128#What-is-the-vagus-nerve, Touchpoint Denmark – Webinar on Digestion by Dorthe Krogsgaard and Peter Lund,

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

Is your need to Control everything affecting your Health?

Is your need to control everything affecting your health and if so, what can you do about it?

It’s understandable to feel that nothing is within our control at the moment. Our current circumstances are creating such uncertainty, that we may feel that we have no control over our lives. As a consequence we may overreact and try and control the things that we can.

Control is a normal response. If our happiness is affected or our safety is threatened, we automatically try and control the situation. If danger is involved, we go into our ‘fight or flight’ mode. Even if it’s not a life or death situation, stress levels can be activated. Our current situation since the pandemic began, is a huge example of this.

When we activate our stress response, for whatever reason, our levels of cortisone and adrenaline rise. Our body prepares to flee the situation. This is a primal survival response that has served us well. However when this stress response remains elevated, we stay in this high alert state and that’s when health issues may result.

Chronic stress can lead to illnesses such as Hypertension, Heart Disease, Stroke, Digestive problems, Diabetes, Asthma, High Cholesterol, Lowered Immune Function and Chronic Fatigue.

In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the Lung and Colon meridians are related to control. The Lungs relate to how easily we ‘Breathe’ through life, whether we need to control everything or whether we feel we have no control. The lungs also hold grief and how we control our emotions and whether or not we have processed or dealt with grief in our life. In many lung conditions, we actually have difficulty controlling our breathing.

The Colon or Large Bowel is also about control. If we are always in control or tightly controlling of ourselves and others, this may result in constipation. If on the other hand, we feel we have no control or allow others to control us, diarrhoea may ensue. Just think of a situation where you are extremely nervous because you have little or no control, such as a job interview or before an exam. You have no control over the questions that may be asked. Very often you have to make a few trips to the toilet and your bowels may be upset.

Our fears around control may stem from childhood or our experiences throughout our lives. We may have had controlling parents who never gave us freedom or perhaps life’s circumstances threatened our safety, so we learnt to control everything that we could. Our reactions are never wrong. We always do what we can to survive and make the best of whatever life presents. Panic buying is just one example of us trying to control our lives. If we are restricted, at least we can control what food etc we have at home. Panic buying helps us to feel safe. It gives us some control over our situation.

What do we do about our need to control everything? And what if control is beyond our reach? What if always being in control no longer serves us?

What I have realised myself, is that I need to let go. I need to ask for help and I need to allow myself to receive. I have had to admit to myself that I cannot control everything, no matter how much I may want to. I allow myself to feel all the emotions, such as anger, frustration, sadness, hopelessness, anxiety, fear and whatever else may arise. Having no control brings up many emotions such as fear and it’s important to recognise this. Look at your fears and decide if they are rational and if your life is in danger. If not, try and let the fear go.

Accept all the emotions that you are feeling. It’s okay not to be happy about your situation. The circumstances may not be what you want, but acceptance reduces the stress. If you can change your outlook and your actions by choosing a different way of doing or looking at things, they may not seem so insurmountable. Perhaps you can’t do things the way you normally do. Does that really matter? Maybe there is another way. Maybe new opportunities will present.

We all have choice and we can all choose how we cope under current circumstances. Ask for help if you need to and recognise if things are beyond your control. Allow others around you to make their own choices. We can’t control their decisions and we shouldn’t try to or judge them for their opinions. We all cope in different ways.

If we try and always stay in control, or fear that we have no control over our lives, we will always stay in a stress response. If on the other hand, we try and accept the things that we cannot change and alter our outlook, we may find that we are a lot calmer, happier and healthier and better able to cope with whatever life presents.

I know which one I would prefer.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

If you are feeling fear or anxiety, these facial nerve points may help. https://solevitality.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/Fear-and-Anxiety-Wellness-Package.pdf

References: Photo by Patrick Mallert on Unsplash 

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

Taking back your Power during a Pandemic.

Power, Empowerment.

Taking back your Power during a Pandemic is possible.

At a time when most of us are facing limitations on our normal lives, it’s very easy to feel powerless. However we still have the capacity to take back some control. I’m not talking about ignoring health advice or jumping on board with conspiracy theories, but instead I’m suggesting that we still have options. Options in how we choose to navigate the restrictions placed on us and how much impact they have on our lives.

Those of us in Melbourne are still in strict lockdown and this can be exhausting and depressing. It can be hard to see the positives in our lives when so much is far from normal. We can stay with these feelings of powerlessness or we can make the most of the opportunities available to us and take back our power.

Here are a few suggestions.

Put some structure into your week. For those who aren’t working or are working reduced hours from home, one day soon drifts into another. Why not put things in place that happen on certain days and so give some structure and meaning to your week. Perhaps do an exercise or dance class online every Wednesday, something creative on Mondays, shopping on Thursdays and rest on weekends. Make it a regular thing that happens on a certain day each week.

Exercise regularly. There is so much available online and a lot of it is free. Maybe you have always wanted to do Yoga or Tai Chi or a dance class. Now is the time. YouTube has some great ones. Get out in nature and enjoy these beautiful sunny days. I’m loving the blossoms and smells of Spring.

Get into the garden and plant some veggies, even in a pot. The winter ones are finishing but summer ones will be available soon. Growing your own food is so rewarding and helps you to stay focused and in the present. No room for fear or worry in the outdoors.

Have you always wanted to meditate but never found the time? Try Insight Timer. It’s a free app and has lots of different mediations from 5 minutes to an hour or more. Give yourself the benefits of this wonderful stress relieving practice. It has become such a part of my morning ritual that I feel unbalanced if I don’t do it.

Want to be creative? Start drawing or painting or just get your phone out and take some photos. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just have fun. I have been re-engaging with my camera and taking photos outside. I even tried out my son’s watercolour paints and had a ball. Creativity develops your whole brain as it requires you to ‘think outside the box’ and engage in some lateral thinking. No room for perfectionism or judgement here. Just play. You will find it so rewarding.

Work your Reflexology nerve points. These will help to balance your body and any underlying issues. There are some free charts under the Products page on my website.

Do something completely different and out of your normal routine. I was gifted an online cooking class recently and had so much fun preparing the (supplied) food. My son and I did it together on Instagram. We had so many laughs trying to keep up with the chef and reading everyone else’s hilarious comments. Look up Providoor.com.au. If you don’t want to cook, have a meal delivered instead.

Talk to your friends and family, often! It’s very easy to become isolated and lonely. Reach out to others and if you need to, ask for help. Don’t be ashamed if you aren’t coping. We all go through ups and downs during this crisis. I recently lost a much loved family pet, then we had some huge storms and no power for 27 hours. On top of that we had to start boiling our drinking water and that was the final straw. A beautiful friend sent me a gift and totally restored my optimism and resilience. Don’t be hard on yourself if things are difficult. We are going through unprecedented times and none of us know how to navigate our way through.

Talk to others and write down how you are feeling. Journalling helps take the anxiety and worry out and puts it on the page instead. Don’t watch the news and laugh, often. Even if its just a silly meme or Gif or a funny movie. They all help to lift your mood. Think of things that you have always wanted to do, be it drawing, dancing, singing, playing an instrument and just do it!

Taking back your power during a pandemic IS possible. You just have to remember that the power is within You.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

References: Photo by Fuu J. on Unsplash

When the World is changing, can Reflexology help?

Peace, stress free, reflexology, wellness, balance.

When the world is rapidly changing and life feels uncertain, can having a Reflexology treatment help? Can it actually make any difference?

I believe so.

Having regular Reflexology treatments won’t change world events, but it can change how you react to them. This year has seen unprecedented circumstances that have affected all of our lives. Australia experienced horrendous bushfires, then the Coronavirus struck around the world and now racial injustice is in the headlines. The old world order has gone, things are changing and life may never be as it was before.

Change is needed but it can bring up worry and anxiety.

Change can also lead to stress, as the unknown often brings up fear. As we all know, chronic stress contributes to so many diseases. Every time we feel anxious, or think a fearful thought or a negative emotion, we stimulate our hormonal and nervous system. Any emotion or thought that causes stress, no matter how small, results in the release of stress hormones. This is an energetic response of the body to cope with the stress. Not all stress is bad but a constant stimulation of our stress hormones, depletes our energy.

Long term stress can also lead to elevated blood pressure, elevated glucose levels, anxiety and worry and impact our immune, digestive and cardiovascular systems. At a time when most of us want to remain really healthy, this is not ideal.

Reflexology can make a significant difference. It deeply calms the body and mind and helps in the release of dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins. These so called, ‘feel-good’ hormones affect our mood, memory, motor function, sleep, learning ability and digestion as well as relieving pain.

Reflexology boosts the immune system, increases circulation and blood supply, hence bringing more oxygenation and nutrition to all of our cells. It also improves the nerve supply to the whole body and helps reduce our sympathetic response so that we don’t stay in that ‘fight or flight’ mode. As mentioned before, it also has a powerful effect on the Hormonal system.

Traditional Chinese Medicine believes that our bodies hold trauma and unless we deal with the emotions involved, be it sadness, anger, anxiety or worry, a disease process begins. Facial reflexology looks at the areas in your body where this disease process started, that is, where you first started to hold this emotion or stress. It then works to relieve this and reduce the impact it is having on your body.

This year has brought up many challenges and fears. We may feel powerless to make a change, though we do have our voice and can let our voices be heard. We can also acknowledge how we are feeling and do something about it. When the world is changing, we still have the power in our hands and Reflexology is a very powerful weapon.

Why not use it!

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

Please note that the clinic has reopened with strict Infection Control policies in place. To book in for a Reflexology treatment, current clients can use this link https://solevitalitybooking.as.me/reflexology

New clients please contact me here https://solevitality.com.au/news/

References: https://www.healthline.com/health/happy-hormone#sunlight

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

What Lessons can you Learn?

Calm, rest, time out, balance

What lessons can you learn from the past two months? As our lives have been turned upside down and we have had to change the way we work, live, socialise and go out, what lessons have you learned?

Have you found that working from home is less stressful or that you miss the company of your colleagues? Have you found that home schooling is enjoyable or maybe you have found it to be a nightmare? Have you found that you are lonely and feeling isolated or are you enjoying the peace and quiet?

Every one of us has been affected in some way. The past few months have changed the whole world. There has been a lot of fear, anxiety, the loss of routines and livelihoods and the passing of many lives. It is something that we have never experienced before and the unknown has brought up many challenges.

It has made many of us question the way we are living and ask ourselves if the past was really that great. Are there changes that we have implemented that have benefited our lives? What lessons can you learn?

I know myself, that things have slowed down a lot. I had to close my clinic in late March and have been starting online work. The days feel longer stretching endlessly and I’m enjoying all the space in my life. I’m going on more walks, cooking more exciting meals with my son and doing online classes that I have been wanting to do. I miss my family and my friends but we chat a lot on the phone or on Zoom. We are blessed to have the technology to connect. I miss my clients and Reflexology and some of the old routines. I miss eating out, concerts, the theatre and seeing family and friends in person.

However I have grown during this time. I have realised that the old ways of doing things no longer work for me. I crave creativity and quiet time and time to do things that light me up. I miss my in-person clients and look forward to seeing them again but I have also enjoyed consulting with clients online. I hope to continue both moving forwards. I am enjoying the flexibility of my life, the ability to go for walks when I want to, rest when my body feels like it and the availability of learning so much online. I am finding balance and I know that I will keep doing these things once restrictions are lifted and more freedom of choice returns.

How have you found this period of time? Have you realised that there are certain things that you will continue doing and take forward with you? Have you learnt that there are certain things that you no longer want in your life? Have you realised the importance of connection and hugs and real physical contact?

What lessons can you learn from the past few months?

It’s worth reflecting on this time as hopefully, we will never experience it again. Despite all the chaos, fear and uncertainty, it may bring about positive change. I hope it has do done so for you!

Warmest Wishes,

Judy xxxx

If you are interested in Strengthening your Immune system during this time, you can work with me here: https://solevitalitybooking.as.me/?appointmentType=13733764

Feed your Body, not your Fear.

We are living in extraordinary times and it’s very easy to feel fear. The future is uncertain as we navigate this new virus and the weeks ahead may be challenging. When we aren’t in control, we feel vulnerable and when we feel vulnerable, we feel fear.

However, if we start to take back our power, we can change how we react to our circumstances. There is much that is out of our control, but there is still a lot we can do to not buy into the fear and empower ourselves to stay strong and healthy.

Building up your Immune system and changing your mindset will do this.

Start by addressing your diet. This is not the time to indulge in alcohol to drown your anxiety, tempting though it may be. Alcohol is inflammatory and will depress your immune system as it affects the functioning of immune cells. A diet high in sugar and processed foods has been shown to hamper the ability of white blood cells to fight infection so a healthy diet with plenty of whole foods, fruit and vegetables will make a huge difference.

Have lots of Water. About 60% of our body is composed of water. All our cells and organs need water to survive. Increase your intake of water to also assist in flushing out toxins. Warm drinks such as tea can also be of benefit. Teas that have antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties include Chamomile tea, Slippery elm, Licorice root, Tumeric or Green tea. You can also add Manuka honey, which is a very potent antibacterial, antiviral and an anti-inflammatory agent.

Sleep is vital for the replenishing of all your cells, especially your T-cells or lymphocytes so take measures to improve your sleep. Try and be in bed by 10pm, especially if you are feeling tired or a bit unwell. Rest during the day if you’re tired. Listen to your Body. Don’t fight through your fatigue. It will only diminish your ability to fight the bugs.

Exercise regularly even if it’s for short periods of time. Exercise increases the circulation of antibodies and white blood cells and being out in the sunshine, increases our production of Vitamin D. A lack of Vitamin D increases our susceptibility to infection.

Supplements such as Vitamin C and D, Zinc, Probiotics and herbs such as Astragalus root, ginger, echinacea, elderberry, garlic, ginseng and oregano all strengthen the immune system.

Address the Fear. This is perhaps the most important for Fear causes Stress. Stress results in inflammation which significantly depresses your immune system. So what measures can you take when the whole world seems to be living in fear?

Stop watching the news! It’s important to be informed but checking once or twice a day is enough and preferably avoid watching it on tv as television always sensationalises everything and feeds the global fear.

Meditate, journal, spend time in nature. An exercise I am doing each morning is a Loving Kindness practice where I am choosing to send love and compassion out into the world. So what does this mean and how can we do it?

Take time each day to shut your eyes and imagine a beautiful warm golden light of love and compassion surrounding yourself. Really feel this love fill up every part of your body. Then imagine this same golden light filling up your family and friends. Surround them in your love. Lastly feel this beautiful warm golden light spreading out and filling up the world. Our love is limitless, so feel the warmth and compassion being sent out to all of Mother Earth. This healing love replaces fear. It only takes a few minutes but if we all do this, it is incredibly powerful. 

Emotional Freedom Technique/EFT or Tapping is also a great tool to reduce fear and anxiety. There are many videos on YouTube that you can follow. Nick Ortner and Brad Yates are two that you could look at.

Lastly Reflexology! Reflexology is a powerful modality to strengthen your immune system and reduce stress. Work the Vietnamese Facial points to boost your immune system. Book in for a treatment to give yourself the benefit of staying healthy and relaxed and know that by taking these measures your are feeding your Body in the best way you can.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

Link to Facial Reflex points for immune system https://solevitality.com.au/immune-system/

Please note that extra cleaning measures are being taken at the clinic. Surfaces are being disinfected after each client and hand sanitiser is available. I will also be using a face mask for Facial Reflexology treatments. Let me know if you have any concerns or questions.

References: www.draxe.com/probiotic-foods, www.ncbi.nim.nih.gov, www.organicfacts.net, www.articles.mercola.com, www.medicinenet.com/vitamin-d-deficiency.

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

How do you measure your Self-Worth?

How do you measure your Self-Worth and what does self-worth actually mean?

Self-Worth is the ‘sense of one’s own value or worth as a person.’ It is very much about who you are, not what you do.

As babies we are not yet aware of our value. We cry and all our needs are generally met. We are as yet, too young to understand a sense of self. As we grow, we become aware of how others treat us and how this makes us feel. We respond to positive feedback and tend to withdraw from criticism. We measure our self-worth by our upbringing and the beliefs we take on from our parents.

Unless we develop a strong sense of self, of who we are and how precious each one of us is, we tend to look to external factors to measure our Self-Worth. We look for praise from family or colleagues, we look for validation from our peers, we look for love outside of ourselves.

Now there is nothing wrong with receiving praise or love from others. This is a vital part of our interaction with the world. But if we are always looking externally to confirm our sense of self worth, or always comparing ourselves to others, we will never be satisfied.  Of course it’s very important to acknowledge our achievements and this helps us develop a sense of self, but unless we value ourselves for our own uniqueness, we will always be listening to that inner critic, that inner voice that says we are not ‘good enough.’

First and foremost, we need to love ourselves. Write down a list of all the things that make you amazing. It might be your smile or sense of humour. It could be your generosity or insight or kindness. We all have wonderful gifts and attributes. We just tend to forget them, especially when we make mistakes or are criticised. It’s then that all our fears and beliefs from past experiences, suddenly appear and we ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be so clever or powerful or successful?’

When this happens, sit with these questions and feel the emotions that they bring up. Is it fear from a past experience or an unhappy memory from your childhood? The more aware we our of our inner critic and where it’s come from, the more we can let these thoughts and feelings go.

Practise affirmations or sayings that reflect how amazing and loveable you are. Write down a list of your values and what is important in your life. Set strong boundaries around how you want to be treated and show compassion towards yourself.

The more you live in alignment with your own beliefs and values, the more you will appreciate how unique and special you are. You don’t need to be a celebrity or a CEO or someone famous, though those things are fine if that’s what you want to do in life. You just need to do work that fulfils you, have relationships that support and sustain you and accept yourself as you are.

Each one of us is worthy of love, kindness, compassion and acceptance. Treat yourself this way too and you will experience a true sense of Self-Worth.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

If you do want to explore this further, you can book in for some mentoring here.

 

References: https://www.psychalive.org/self-worth/, https://positivepsychology.com/self-worth/ Photo by Content Pixie – Unsplash.com

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

Does it pay you to stay strong? ………….. If so, how?

Does it pay you to stay Strong? How does this help you?

Growing up we are told that ‘big girls/boys don’t cry. Keep that stiff upper lip, don’t be a sook or a sissy.’

It’s acceptable to a point to show our emotions as children, but once we become adults, it is often considered a sign of weakness if we ‘ wear our heart on our sleeve’.

But keeping our emotions, be it grief, trauma or sadness bottled up, only delays the inevitable. Some day you will need to face that fear or loss, or it may contribute to disease.

I lost my younger sister many years ago. Although I grieved at the time, I had a two year old son to care for so I kept going and pushed down all those traumatic emotions. I told myself that I would have time to grieve later. I stayed strong, or so I thought!

Consequently I started to overprotect those I loved and worried endlessly if someone was late home. I tended to catastrophise events out of all proportion. This only led to overwhelm. It was exhausting trying to control everything and everyone in my life. After many years and lots of support, I learnt to let go, trust and show how I felt and not bottle everything up. I never forgot, but I learnt to deal with the pain of loss.

Traditional Chinese Medicine has believed for several thousands of years, that emotions are powerful energies that strongly affect our Qi ( our life energy) and our  overall health.

In the 1980’s Dr. Candace Pert  demonstrated the link between emotions and health. Dr. Pert discovered that certain brain chemicals called neuropeptides, which she called “molecules of emotion,” act as messengers between the mind and the immune system. Her findings revealed that thoughts and emotions directly impact the physical body and our health.

In Chinese medicine our emotions are strongly linked to our organs and the process of disease.

For example, our Lungs and our Large Bowel show how easily we ‘breathe’ through life, whether we have to control everything and every body or we have the ability of letting go. Our lungs also hold grief and if we haven’t dealt with that grief,  imbalances will result in that organ. If not treated, this strong emotion may lead to disease either in the lungs or elsewhere in the body.

Our Stomach and Spleen hold worry and stress and manage our immune system and digestion. If we are constantly worrying or not dealing with the stress in our lives, we may end up with a deficiency in our immune or digestive systems.

The Kidneys hold fear and constant thoughts of fear. If we are always fearful of life and what may unfold, this leads to an imbalance in our kidney energy. In Traditional Chinese Medicine, the kidneys are our ‘life force’ and a key organ in sustaining life.

The Liver and Gall Bladder are where we hold anger, frustration or resentment. As the liver is involved in so many functions in our body, including our metabolism and energy, it pays to have a healthy liver.

Facial Reflexology detects areas of our body that are out of balance and treats these accordingly. However it also looks at the emotion behind the affected organ as many diseases are influenced by strong, repressed emotions.

So what are the benefits of staying strong? Yes it means we don’t fall in a heap or cry hysterically when something happens but who does this actually help? The people who might be embarrassed by your behaviour or does it help you? Sometimes we need to carry on until a time is suitable to grieve or deal with a trauma. However deal with it we must. No matter how painful something may be, unless we deal with it and get help to do so if we need, we will never be able to grow or move through life.

I’m not saying that it’s easy because it’s not. I know! It may be the hardest thing you have to deal with in your life. But dealing with your emotions, not always staying strong and allowing yourself to be vulnerable may just keep you healthy and living longer.

Let me know what you think. I would love to know your thoughts and if you would like a Facial Reflexology session to deal with some of these emotions, please let me know.

Warmest wishes,

Judy xxx

 

References: https://www.tcmworld.org/emotion-commotion/Image: Pixabay.com

Disclaimer: Please note that all information in this article is the opinion of the author and obtained through her research and knowledge and the above references. It is not meant to replace medical advice and a medical opinion should always be obtained for any health condition.

Does fear rule your life….and how you can change this.

IMG_8457-225x300I have recently noticed how much fear and worry there is in my life and the life of many people I speak with. By this, I don’t mean terror about everyday things but a general anxiety about decisions and events that may affect our lives.

We are born as perfect babies without fear or anxiety. Soon however, the fears of our parents and the world around us starts to impact on our lives. We are told to behave and be ‘good’ children, we are taught to study hard or else we will fail, we need to get great jobs so we can buy a house.Yes the fear of failure is instilled in us from an early age. Some fears are necessary to protect us, for example, you don’t touch something hot or you will be burn’t, you don’t cross the road without looking or else you may be hit by a car. However we are fed with fear every day of our lives and it’s very difficult to not get caught up in this fear cycle.

The media is great at telling us about the latest war, disaster, murder or other gruesome crime. It’s very easy then to develop a fear of flying, going out at night, or being mugged. We learn to worry about our children and their decisions, we are scared not to be in control in case ‘something’ happens, we fear being ill, we fear failure and we fear being successful in case we become overwhelmed. As Marianne Williamson says in her book, ‘A Return to Love”, ‘We are so scared of death that we fear living.’ Along the way we have learn’t to doubt our inner wisdom and intuition.

This all sounds pretty negative but believe me, it can be changed and here are some suggestions.

1. One way is to remove the source of the fear. Watching the news every night reinforces how terrible life can be, so don’t watch it on a regular basis. I was addicted to the news and every night at 6pm, I would rush to turn the television on in case I missed out on something. Once I stopped doing this, I realised how silly it was. Firstly, my life was no longer dictated by a 6pm call up and secondly, I didn’t need to hear or see half of what I was being exposed to. I don’t mean to advise that you shut yourself off from the world, but sometimes you don’t need to know all the gory details. I do listen to the headlines or check them on the internet but I don’t need to see the full details of the horror that the media loves to report on. We may think that we become desensitised to the news, but it does deeply affect us on a subconscious level and instills a lot of fear into our lives.

2. Change your reaction to the fear. By this I mean, put the fear into context. Ask yourself if the fear is realistic e.g. am I going to crash next time I fly? Highly unlikely! Also ask yourself, what in this situation is causing my fear? Is is a fear of not being in control, worrying about someone else’s decisions that may or may not affect you? I know I often worry about my son and the decisions he makes in his life. But I have learn’t to trust him and know that he has to learn for himself and I can’t control his life or his decisions. I may not always agree with them, but I have learn’t to put my faith in him as an adult and respect the choices he makes.

3. Examine the fear and look as where it comes from. Is is based on a childhood trauma or some other trauma in your life? You won’t be able to change what disaster has happened in the past but if you are aware of the fear and where it is coming from, you lessen the power you give to it. Writing it down, often helps too. If we live our lives fearing what may or may not happen, we don’t LIVE our lives.

4. Know that you don’t need to control everything! Is your fear based on trying to control everything in your life? I know that I have always been a bit of a control freak. The house had to be cleaned by me or it wasn’t done properly. I needed to do all the shopping or the brand I wanted wasn’t purchased. Cheryl Richardson in her book “The Art of Extreme Self-Care” says that she would even re-stack the dishes in the dishwasher because she felt her husband didn’t do it properly. This made me laugh as it’s something that I have been guilty of too! Letting others do the things you think YOU need to do, allows you to let go of the fear that ‘it’s not good enough”. It allows you to trust and know that things will still happen even if it’s not your way.

5. Breathe when fear strikes. By this I don’t mean that you suddenly stop everything and sit down and meditate, but do allow yourself to breathe. If I’m anxious, worried or fearful about something, I take a few deep breaths to calm down, then I breathe out the fear and breathe in a feeling of love instead. As I breathe in the love, with each ‘out’ breath the fear diminishes a little and loses its effect. I often practise this while meditating. It may sound very simple but by letting go of your fear and replacing it with love, allows you to trust in things working out. It really is quite a powerful exercise.

Remember that fear doesn’t need to control your life. Choose to let go and trust in life’s challenges and adventures. Live the life you have, love and laugh a lot and you may find that any fears that remain, lose their effect and potency.