What do I mean by an Energy Vampire? Well it’s a person or event that robs you of your strength, energy and vitality. Something or someone that ‘bleeds’ you dry.
It’s that relative who is always asking you for a favour or the boss who is never satisfied with your work buts keeps asking more and more of you. It’s that friend who rings for a brief chat but is still talking to you an hour and a half later while you try to end the conversation. It’s the committee that keeps asking for your assistance although you are the one who volunteers all the time.
It’s the long queues at Christmas or the people who ring you at all times of the day or night. It’s the family members who expect you to do all the work and never step up to help themselves.
These are all Energy Vampires and we all have them in our lives at some point or other.
What can we do about them? The first step to eliminate them (and yes it is possible), is to recognise what people or events in your life drain your energy.
Once you know what they are, you can start implementing strategies to either remove them or to lessen the impact they have on you. Have a think about the people or events that cause the most fatigue or stress for you. Write them down. Remember that if you are stressed, your energy reserves are being depleted.
Start putting some strong boundaries in place around your time and energy.
If you are asked to help out, say you will let the person know. If you are too tired or really don’t want to commit, this gives you time to think about it and decide what really suits you.
If a chatty friend rings, say you only have a short time available and keep an eye on the clock. Then politely tell them you have to go.
If you boss is being unreasonably demanding, explain how you can be more productive if given extra time to finish something.
If you get phone calls out of hours, don’t answer and check your messages later. Most things can wait.
If the queues at Christmas exhaust you, shop early in the day before it’s too busy or shop online. Many things can easily be bought that way.
If family are putting unreasonable demands on you, tell them you cannot help this time.
Learn to say No and start implementing some boundaries around your availability and your time. You will find that some people may not like this but that’s okay. We are not here to please everyone.
Give yourself time to think before agreeing to something. The more you do to respect yourself and your own needs, the more energy you will have. The more you learn to say No, the more people will respect your boundaries.
People are often unaware of the amount of stress they cause or the energy they take from you. This may be because their own boundaries are weak. Be an example for them so that they can rethink the way they treat others and themselves.
Learn to prioritise what is important in your life. Do more of the things that fill your soul, make you happy and revitalise you. Let go of what isn’t important or delegate it to another day.
Let go of these vampires. Put yourself first and you won’t need any garlic. I can guarantee it!
Ps. Let me know if you have any questions or comments.
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